Wednesday, January 10, 2018

Why Home Birth?




“What made you decide on a home birth?” This is a question I get asked a lot! I am so hesitant to talk about our home birth decision not because I’m ashamed or because I don’t stand behind it 10000%, but more because there is SO much misinterpretation, false information, fear and strong feelings surrounding home births and with the larger community I have, I know some of those strong feelings will come out. But any time I have shared little hints to the fact that we are planning a home birth, I’ve received so many supportive, encouraging, and uplifting messages from people just well wishing, people that have done it themselves, or people that are curious and want to learn more! And that last reason is why I’m sharing what made us decide on a home birth! I’m constantly on the lookout for more resources and more people that have experienced unmedicated and/or home births and honestly I take and learn something from everyone I talk to, so if one person is able to learn a little something from me, it is worth it for me to drop my vulnerability walls and share my feelings. 

Natural birth has always been something I said I wanted to do. Even as a 10 year old girl I remember watching water births saying that I was going to do that one day. With my 1st pregnancy I didn’t plan or research much because I went in with the mindset that I’m a first time mom, I have no idea what to expect, we will just kind of go with the flow. Well that mentality got me to an induction with Pitocin, me begging for the epidural only to find out medically it is too risky for me to have one, which sent me into a full blown panic attack and left me 100% mentally checked out for my labor. (Read her story here) It was extremely traumatic to say the least. I spent a good amount of time mourning the fact that I would never experience labor like my friends and those I knew. I would never have a peaceful labor experience, I would never be able to look back on labor and use the words magical or calm. I was mad that I wouldn’t be able to have those moments right before pushing that I could look into my husbands eyes and smile and say “she’s almost here!” because I would be too checked out and in misery from the pain. 

When I became pregnant again 8 months later, I blocked out any and all thoughts about labor. Any time I tried to think of it or do any sort of “preparation” because I knew I had to go natural, I became extremely nauseous and sweaty. I had PTSD and I had it bad. Because of this, I really didn’t do as much research and preparing as I should have, but what helped the most was reading others positive natural labor stories. Because my first experience was so scary and traumatic, it was really really hard for me to picture natural labor any other way. All I could think of was the screaming, the thrashing, the feeling of defeat, and just wanting to give up and I thought that there was no way natural labor could be any different. I tried to look into the hypnobirthing method, but any time they brought up to think of contractions not as painful, but as pressure, and not call them contractions but surges, I couldn’t fully get behind that because mine were nothing but painful. My mind was so made up and convinced that natural labor HAD to be torture that no method or convincing could help me. I found the most help from reading others positive natural birth stories because little by little it helped break down that belief I had that natural birth MUST be torturous for everyone. Hearing so many different people’s experiences with hard, but pleasant unmedicated labors helped ease my mind just a little bit. Story by story.

And then it came time. My second baby girl needed to enter this world and I had to give natural labor another go. And her labor went better, oh it went SOO much better! (Read her story here) I was present mentally the entire time, and because I was more present this time, I was able to think “I want to do ___ to be more comfortable” or “I can feel I need to ____” to keep progressing or thoughts like that. But with each feeling my body was telling me to do, I was faced with obstacles. Whether that obstacle was the 100 cords and IV’s I was hooked up to, or the nurses telling me to do otherwise, or that I wasn’t allowed due to hospital policy and so on. It was frustrating to say the least, to feel like I was physically able, and had my body begging me to do certain things, but being told no and having that “no” impact my labor experience greatly. And what’s one of the most frustrating parts is that through out my pregnancy, I was super open with my OB about the fact that I had to go natural and we talked a lot about my different options for making myself comfortable during labor. He was great and seemed to be 100% supportive on letting me do what my body was telling me. We specifically talked about me being able to walk around, push in different positions, not using Pitocin for the entire labor etc. However, once actually checked in and in labor, all of those requests were faced with a fight. I remember telling Michael, my husband, that next time I’m laboring at a birth center or at home. If I have to go natural without a choice, I definitely should have more choices on how I go natural and more choices on how to make myself comfortable. I remember thinking, “well other people get the option of the epidural to help with pain, and all I want to do is to be able to stand up to help with the pain, or to roll over without needing 3 people to help with cords, or to push on all fours cause that’s what felt best, or to use the bathroom like normal to relieve pressure, and I’m told no?” I knew in the middle of that labor, that even though it was going GREAT and so much better than my first, that it could have gone better, and it should have gone better. 

I know there are hospitals out there that are FANTASTIC for natural birthing and are really supportive of mom’s doing and following what they want, my biggest wish is that more hospitals would follow in that lead and become more natural birth friendly and accessible. Unfortunately, that’s what I thought I was getting for my second labor, but unfortunately things seemed to flip once I was actually in labor. 

So here we are with baby number 3!! Instead of “I have to give birth again.” I was shouting “I get to give birth again!” and thinking that I get another shot to make this birth exactly what I want it to be. I was going to fight for it this time. I was too scared and traumatized last time, but this time was going to be different. We had moved from Virginia to Utah and I knew Utah was a bit more natural birth friendly and I would have the option of a birth center nearby this time! I found a birth center not even 10 minutes from me that has been amazing since day one. If you don’t know what to picture when I say birth center, it is an old house that has each bedroom set up as a birthing suite with a full bathroom, deep tub, queen bed, dresser, refrigerator etc. Feels just like a master bedroom. The “waiting area” is in the living room. The environment and type of care I get at the birthing center is just a whole different level. My midwife has come to feel more like a family member than my midwife. I can honestly say I love her. I truly feel like I found her for a reason. She is everything I would want in a birth professional and supporter. I am never rushed, I never wait, the staff all knows my name and my medical history without me having to explain or remind them of anything every appointment. She texts me every now and then to check in, and I can text her anytime I have a question. At my appointments I see my midwife, and she typically has a student midwife assisting her. I actually used a midwife that practiced in an OB office for my first pregnancy until about 36 weeks when I was transferred to the OB’s care because she moved. Both my midwife that worked in the OB office and my midwife this time are CNM’s. This stands for Certified Nurse Midwife. This means the midwife has gone through formal nurses’ training and certification as well as a Masters Degree in midwifery. Most CNMs work in hospitals, but are allowed to work in hospitals, OB offices, birth centers, and home birth practices. They are also able to carry medications, and write prescriptions. My midwife was a labor and delivery nurse for 25 years and then went on to become a Certified Nurse Midwife in 1997 where she worked in a hospital setting as a midwife for 15 years, and then went on to practice solely at the birth center she is at now! She carries with her a sense of peace and calming. I get so much comfort and reassurance from her for any fears or questions I have! I trust her training, her expertise, her skills, and her ability to handle any situation that may come up with the unpredictability of labor. 

What ultimately was the deciding factors for me for home versus birth center was the fact that I have 2 kids at home and no family extremely close by. Our closest family members are about and hour away from us, the thought of having to last minute find a babysitter for them was causing extreme anxiety to me. Being able to just let them keep sleeping or work through early labor with them while we wait on a babysitter was much more comforting to me. Also my previous labors were quick! They say the third baby is a gamble, but I did not want to gamble possibly laboring/delivering in the car! No thanks haha! From the time I really felt my first contraction to when I was holding Phoebe it was about 1.5-2 hours long. So it just felt almost pointless to go through the trouble to make it to the birth center for such a short amount of time if this baby comes quickly as well. You typically only stay at the birth center for a few hours after delivery so I just didn’t see a huge reason for that when they have all that I have at home besides laughing gas is available if I went in. 

In addition to the support I receive from my Midwife, we have hired a doula this pregnancy! Something that I did not use my previous pregnancies and honestly, I was super skeptical if I even needed one.  A general definition of a doula is someone that “acts as an advocate for the mother, encouraging and helping her fulfill specific desires she might have for her birth. The goal of a doula is to help the mother experience a positive and safe birth, whether an un-medicated birth, epidural, or a cesarean." You can read more about doulas here! Often times doulas and midwives get confused for each other. Midwives have official medical training, where doulas do not. Doulas are there for support of the mother. It has been expected for women to help other women through the childbirth process since the beginning of time. They are not meant to replace the role of the spouse, but rather compliment. The spouse and the doula work together to each offer specific support to the mother. In home birth settings the doula is often responsible for getting the birth pool ready, grabbing towels, snacks, ice water, food, or any other things wanted by mom during labor. They have great knowledge on positions to get into for different scenarios, tricks up their sleeves to help stalled labor, lightheadedness after birth, and they offer emotional support and motivation. They help keep the mom grounded and calm. During pregnancy we have 3 meetings with her. First meeting is just a really informal meeting of each other to make sure our personalities click, I can ask any questions about her and her experience. Second meeting we go over goals for the birth, what fears/anxiety we may have, what we expect/hope from her, etc. I just had this second meeting last week and loved it! I especially loved that she was asking each question to both me and my husband individually, because this is just as much his experience as it is mine. He has his own fears and goals. The third meeting is more hands on learning. We practice positions, breathing, learn about Rebozo, counter pressure and so on! I love these meetings because they all happen in my home, in my comfort place. It also helps me visualize the birth better because we are practicing right where it is going to take place. Our doula is also available 24/7 for texts and phone calls for any questions I have! She has already helped me find a new chiropractor, sent me different resources on days I’m having anxiety to help any fears or doubts, recommended birth supplements to ask my midwife about, and so so much more! We haven’t even used her for labor yet and I already feel she was 100% worth it and all my skepticism is gone! She has been such a blessing! 

I have found so many different resources this pregnancy to help educate myself more on home births/unmedicated births. I would say I spend on average at least one hour EVERY SINGLE DAY for the last 9 months doing some type of preparation or research for birth/labor. Whether that be watching a documentary, listening to a podcast, reading a book, researching the internet, watching videos, etc. I could make this blog 10839 pages long and probably still not cover everything I’ve learned about home and unmedicated births the last few years but especially the last 9 months. It isn’t something I think anyone should be talked into and it is 100% not for everyone and I GET THAT, but if something in your gut is telling you that’s what you want your experience to be, or if you simply want to learn more to understand others that do it, learn more! I promise you there’s something out there that you will learn and benefit from, or there is probably a myth that you’ll learn the truth of. There is so much information out there at our fingertips and if you have any questions or are interested in learning more about unmedicated or home births here are some resources I highly recommend!

  1. Evidence Based Birth! All the praise hands! This is one of the best educational resources I've found that covers pretty much anything you will face as far as labor practices and their standard protocols either inside a hospital or outside. They do an excellent job at keeping it non biased and strictly informational. They also site all of their sources and studies they refer to for you to look at on your own! This is a great website for any and all birth types! Just a great way to learn more about the "why" behind a lot of protocols and standards. 
  2. The Birth Hour Podcast. They are free on the podcast app that comes on your iPhone. I love this podcast because they share every single type of birth. Induced, planned c sections, emergency c sections, home, birth, home birth transfers, unassisted births and more! It is a great place to hear other women’s experiences! I learn something new almost every episode! 
  3. Doing it at home podcast. Another podcast sharing birth stories, except this one is specifically for home births. A lot of the people on there sharing their stories are health professionals that choose to birth at home which brings a unique perspective! 
  4. Why not home Documentary! I LOVED this movie. It is put together by an OB that chooses home birth for herself, which again brings a really valuable and unique perspective. It gives a LOT of research and statistics and goes over studies about home births. She travels all over the US to interview other health professionals that choose home birth and why. It is really evidence based, and being a Type A personality and a lover of research and proof, I really appreciated. 
  5. Business of Being Born, this is a popular one and often talked about when talking about “why natural birth”. It used to be available on Netflix but I don’t believe it is anymore. You can rent it for $3.99. It talks a lot about just how much the birthing industry has changed and shifted through time and how their really is a business side of of that unfortunately can greatly influence YOUR birth. 
  6. Ina May Gaskins Guide to childbirth. Ina May is considered to be the mother of midwives. She is so knowledgable! I haven’t read the entire book (yet) but the first half of it is all birth stories! So if you're like me and you are constantly clicking on peoples links to their blogs of their birth stories soaking in every word, you will love this book! And like I mentioned before, reading others birth stories have been the biggest help to me because they are REAL first hand experiences that helped break down my belief I had for natural birthing. 
  7. The Calm Birth Method. I have been listening to bits and pieces of this through audible for amazon. I love how it teaches how to feel confident in your body and feel at peace about birth no matter what happens. It has helped me tremendously work through any fears I may have. 
  8. The Birth Hour Website! They have compiled SO MUCH GOODNESS and have it all available in one place! They have information on every single type of birth as well! Not just home births or unmedicated! 

So here is a little bit about my “why” and my journey that has brought me to planning our home birth for my 3rd! 
One of my all time favorite quotes is "Wherever and however you intend to give birth, your experience will impact your emotions, your mind, your body and your spirit for the rest of your life." and another one that really got me through my PTSD phase is by Laura Stavoe Harm and she says, "We have a secret in our culture, and it's not that birth is painful. It's that women are strong." 



UPDATE: 

Unfortunately something came up in our 34 week follow up ultrasound and we are no longer considered great candidates for a home birth. I have a growth on my placenta that we have been watching closely and it has gotten big enough that our midwife, ourselves, and the MFM doctor we have seen all feel most comfortable having continuous monitoring on baby girl to ensure her cord does not become compressed by the growth during labor and delivery. Hospitals are there for a great reason and they have their time and place, and for this labor, that happens to be the safest place for me to deliver. We will definitely be shooting and planning for a home birth for our next babies. 

I have many fears and anxieties (some mentioned in this post) about going to the hospital, but I am so so grateful for all the preparation and knowledge I have acquired this pregnancy while planning a home birth and still plan on applying all of it for a hospital setting. I am so grateful to have my doulas support as well! I have great hope and faith that I will still be able to have the peaceful calm birth I was hoping for, just in a different setting! 

I am so extremely grateful for my Midwife and her constant eye on us through out this pregnancy to ensure both myself and baby are the safest we could be! 

Friday, December 29, 2017

Baby Fox the Third Bumpdate!




I can’t let this entire pregnancy go without a single bumpdate!!! So here I am! I can’t believe I’m already 
33 weeks!! 
“Full term” in just 4 weeks! what! Where did time go? This pregnancy definitely has been the hardest on my body and so many new things and symptoms have come from it. The first thing is my placenta is anterior this time which is new for me! Second, I have a cyst on my placenta that they are watching the growth of, if it gets too big it could be a sign that it’s something other than just a cyst, this also has caused me to measure about 4 weeks ahead the whole time. Third different thing would be my tailbone pain. I fractured my tailbone during labor with my first daughter, Milan, however, the constant pain died down to pretty occasional only after sitting for an extended amount of time when she was about 7 months old. I went through phoebe’s whole pregnancy tpainfree and thankfully, didn’t fracture it again during her labor and hardly had pain from it again. Almost from the second I have been pregnant this time, the pain has been unbearable. It feels like it is a fresh fracture all over again. I’ve seen a chiropractor twice a week for the past few months but I think I am switching to a new one to hopefully see some better results! So if you’ve seen me waddling since I was 10 weeks along…now you know why! haha! 

BABY SIZE: I’ll know a bit more after my ultrasound next week, but according to my apps, she is about 4.75 pounds and 18 inches long on average. About the size of a cauliflower blossom if you’re into comparing babies to food! 

MATERNITY CLOTHES: Oh heavens yes. Since like 10 weeks this pregnancy!

MOVEMENT: Lots! Which I’m so so grateful for. When I first found out my placenta was anterior I had myself fully convinced that I would barely feel her and when I did that it would be super muffled, not anything I was used to. Both my previous girls were pretty crazy in the womb and those crazy movements got me through hard days honestly. I spent a few weeks the beginning of this pregnancy being pretty depressed that I wouldn’t have that same experience this time. Luckily, I was wrong and this girl is just as crazy in the womb as the older girls! 

BEST MOMENT OF THE WEEK: Christmas was this week so obviously that was just super special! Milan understands so much of it this year and has been talking about Santa coming down the fireplace for months! It has been so great to be in Virginia with all of her cousins and my family.

MISS ANYTHING: Being able to move around and do things like normal. It has been a slap to my face how hard this pregnancy has been and I definitely have not been able to keep up on my house like I normally would be able to. I can barley pick up either of the girls now which is also really hard and not fair to them, so of course I miss being able to do that! I also miss being able to eat without the annoying consequence of acid reflux. A simple drink of water without consequences would be nice haha! 

FOOD CRAVINGS: Not really! I love ice, but I’ve never really had really strong food cravings, mostly aversions. 

ANYTHING MAKE YOU QUEASY: I haven’t really gotten sick again yet! I did late in the 3rd trimester both previous pregnancies so we will see when that comes on! 

WEIGHT GAIN: About 30 pounds so far, I try not to check the scale more than I have to at my midwife appointments! 

STRETCH MARKS: A few new ones! 

HAPPY OR MOODY: Pretty moody at times, but overall happy! The moody days normally follow a crappy nights sleep or after 6pm everyday when I’m too exhausted to control my emotions! 

SYMPTOMS: I could go on forever. I don’t think there’s one thing my body is doing normally right now haha! So many symptoms! The worst being acid reflux, rib flare pain, and my dang tailbone. It’s rough because if I sit up to help my acid reflux, my tailbone is unbearable. But if I lay down to help my tailbone and ribs, I choke on acid reflux! So fun haha! 

LOOKING FORWARD TO: Getting back home and finishing the nursery! I am so close to having it done and I just love how it has turned out! I can’t wait to share either. I love going in there and just dreaming. 

I have a follow up ultrasound next week that I’m really excited about! I never have had an ultrasound this late in pregnancy so it will be a new experience! I have a mass on my placenta that they are watching the growth of which is the reason for the scan! 

LEFT TO DO: January and february is full on baby prep time! I need to order my birth pool, we have a labor class to attend ( just a quick one), I have 2 lessons with Michael and my Doula to go over ways both of them can best help me in labor. I have my home visit with my midwives where they come to my house and make sure everything is all set up alright for the home birth, and a few other last minute baby items still need to be purchased! Mostly the small things like gas drops, a baby tub, my pump etc! 

Wednesday, October 25, 2017

Shared Girls Room

 Woah! Hey guys, I still have this blog! 2017 has been a year for the books that's for sure!! Life just got so busy, I really don't have the time to blog anymore! I wish I did, and I miss it! I keep meaning to do some bump date posts on here because I know I'll regret not doing so!! Soon!!

We moved to Utah in March and have been loving every second of it here! This move has been amazing for our family and I can say with full confidence that this is where we are supposed to be! Our new house is just a rental that has 3 bedrooms! That means that with the new baby, the girls need to share! Which is great! I've always wanted them to share but could never force myself to be brave enough to pull the trigger! Getting pregnant was just the push I needed! And turns out, I was afraid for no reason! The transition went perfectly, like they had been sleeping together their whole lives! We just stuck to our normal bedtime routines and made sure the white noise machine was on!

Shortly after putting them together in the same room, I knew I needed to get rid of Milan's twin bed. Their room is so small, having a full sized twin and a crib in there left almost no room for playing. I instantly fell in love withe the Jenny Lind Toddler bed from DaVinci baby! It was exactly what I had dreamt up of in my head! I decided to just get 2 off the bat instead of going back and getting Phoebe a matching one later! I was super brave and decided to try to switch phoebe to a toddler bed! At 19 months! This was the same age we moved Milan (although we had too, she knew how to climb out and couldn't be stopped!) I was mostly motivated by my OCD of really wanting their beds to match! Phoebe really did great! If she had been in her own room, it would have been a seamless transition! However, because they are in the same room, she just bugged Milan too much before falling asleep in her own bed. Milan is a deep sleeper but I would watch Phoebe on the monitor crawling all over Milan, pulling her hair, kicking her, etc. She did this for about 20-30 minutes, sometimes more, every night before falling asleep in her own bed. We decided to be fair to poor Milan, we would put phoebe back in her crib! She also sleeps in longer when in her crib! And then she decided to pull a fast one on us and the first day she as back in her crib, she magically knew how to climb out now!! What!?! So mattress on the floor it goes! I hated pulling out her cute matching bed, but sometimes (more like all of the times) with parenting, functionality always wins, and in this case, that means a crib with a mattress on the floor!


Our main focus piece is obviously the wallpaper from yours truly! My company Shop B Darling! Like I mentioned before, we are in a rental! Renter friendly wallpaper that is removed in under 10 minutes with no damage! 

I am obsessed with their name signs above their cribs from The Trendy Timber! They really put the finishing touch on the room and Milan reads them off to me every chance she gets! 

Other links: Listed under photos!! 








Book baskets: World Market
Hardware bar: IKEA
S hooks: Ikea 
Stay Sweet My Babies print set: Nook and Niche
Bed comforter: Target 
 

Crib: Ikea (style discontinued) 



Cube storage: Ikea
Wicker baskets: Ikea 
Pink basket: (discontinued but available in other colors) Ikea


House shelves: Target
Toy bin: Ikea Hack with Bookshelf and Legs  

This toy bin isn't actually meant to be a toy bin, it's a bit of a hack! I used construction silicone to attach the leg unit to what should be the back of the bookshelf, but super glue or wood glue would do the job! I just had some silicone on hand already!! It was a much cheaper alternative to many similar toy bins out there! 

Monday, January 2, 2017

2016 Year In Review

This year was a really really good one! Just lots of quality time as a family in our little home! Lots of adventures and traveling! Michael traveled A TON and it has really taught me to take full advantage and enjoy the time that we do get together as a family! It also taught me that I am strong and that I can do more than I think I could. We didn't have any huge job change, big move, new cars in 2016, but we did have the huge life changing event of adding our Phoebe girl to our family! 


JANUARY:








  • Milan had her firs snow experience!!
  • We finished our kitchen remodel!
  • I flew out to Arizona to be there for one of my best friend's wedding!

FEBUARY:




  • Kind of uneventful as we got ready for Phoebe's arrival!
  • Lots of cuddles in bed 
  • Michael was out of town for valentines day:(


MARCH: 












  • Our biggest month this year!
  • Milan turned 18 months old! 
  • We walked around a lot trying to get labor going! 
  • Phoebe was born!! 
  • While we were in the hospital all of the trees bloomed, it was the best to come home to! 
  • Spent the majority of the month in PJ's, figuring out breastfeeding, getting outside to enjoy the perfect weather. 


APRIL:









  • More snuggles in bed with the girls! 
  • Had our first official outing to the zoo! 
  • Put the girls in their first set of matching easter dresses! 
  • Life moved pretty slowly-but also so fast! 


MAY:










  • Started coming out of the newborn fog/juggling two kids! 
  • Went on our first beach trip of the season! Milan was obsessed! 
  • Tried to walk daily.


JUNE:








  • Spent as much time outside as possible! 
  • Lots of time in the water! 
  • We explored different spots in richmond and around Virginia that got us out of the house! 
  • Went up to Philadelphia for fathers day! I surprised Michael with front row tickets to see the Dbacks play the Phillies! 


JULY: 











  • Continued to swim and spend a lot of time at the splash pad
  • Went to the state fair a few times! Milan especially loved the animals! 
  • We visited Pittsburg for the 4th of July! 
  • I hosted a little meet up of some Instagram friends! 
  • Took Milan to her first movie "Finding Dory"-she lasted maybe 15 minutes! 


AUGUST:











  • August was a huge month for us as well! 
  • The month began with us visiting my family in Utah for our annual family reunion! We've had it for 76 years! 
  • We then went down to Arizona for a week and unfortunately all of us got sick:( We spent our whole vacation in bed or puking! 
  • We flew home for a few days and then flew to France!! 
  • We spent our time in France mostly on the beach or eating! 


SEPTEMBER: 








  • Milan turned TWO!! 
  • Phoebe turned 6 months old!! 
  • We got home from France and just took some time to relax at home! 
  • We potty trained Milan! 
  • Visited another little fair! 

OCTOBER: 












  • Went and visited our friends that live in Ohio for halloween! 
  • Enjoyed all the pretty fall leaves! 
  • Took advantage of the cooler weather and got outside more! 
  • Visited a pumpkin patch! 

NOVEMBER:












 





  • Another big month! 
  • I turned 23!! 
  • We picked up our new puppy Bruno! 
  • Went and visited Michael's sister and her family in Texas for Thanksgiving! 
  • Decorated for christmas! 



DECEMBER:














  • Visited the Washington DC LDS temple lights for the 2nd year! 
  • Looked at some christmas trees! 
  • I threw my sister a baby shower! She's having my first niece on my side!! So excited to have a girl cousin close to my kids' age! 
  • Flew to Arizona to spend the holidays! 
  • All the Fox cousins except 3 were there! It was a full house for 2 weeks filled with lots of cousin play! 
  • Lots of time outside in perfect weather!
  • Christmas morning (that I got no pictures of :( ) 



I'm not sure what 2017 has in store for us! I do know we have some big exciting changes coming up that I am so excited to see how they play out! This year my main goal is to worry less and enjoy more! To just be present in the moment and not worry what next month holds for me! To enjoy every single day and to be courageous when it comes to trials. Face them head on. I'm hoping to find more of "me" this year. So much of last year was centered around my kids and I was swallowed by all things baby and kids, I am hoping this year brings a little bit more of myself out and that I can find something that is just for ME and that makes ME happy. Here's to 2017!!! I'm excited to have you guys follow along!